"It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands."
--Jaka
"Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition."
--Alexander Smith
"Love means to commit oneself without guarantee, to give oneself completely in the hope that our love will produce love in the loved person. Love is an act of faith, and whoever is of little faith is also of little love."
--Erich Fromm
You know, I have never been on a casual date with some sexually frustrated, doting infactuated young boy, never been taken out to dinner every night of the week by different charming fellows, never danced the night a way at a swanky, dim lighted club with every man with rhythmic feet, never obsessed over fairy tale dresses and gone out to any proms, balls with a handsome tuxedo clad guy. Alhamdulilah, I had to wait on every normal occurance in most American young womens' lives.
I've missed out on so much (so they say) and yet, I feel I've been given the opportunity to experience so much more in terms of romance and love. Waiting. Believing. Fearing. Being Me. Muslim. Alhamdulilah. Seven years ago a man came into my life. Though he never approached me. Never. Never called me. Never even sent me an email. Every form of communication came through my parents. Infact, my mother talked with this man every day, two and three times some days. They talked, discussed. Laughed and bonded. Because of me. We married and for the first time in my life I sat next to a man. Not just any man. A Muslim man. Over ten years older than I. Bearded. Attar Majmua oil perfumed thoub and izar. Tall. Shy. Eyes lowered, a bit afraid...my husband.
Seven years now I've been sharing my life with this man who values the same things that I value, who worships as I do and places the same importance on it... love, halal love and romance, is there is anything better in this dunya? Today (just today cause you know us women folk are fickle, lol), I know of nothing better.
Whoever says romance doesn't have any place in the lives of the Musleema, didn't know me. Then again Mr.Muslim says I'm different, it's the spice of this Musleema's life. Not ashamed to be thriving off of it. I received a text message at fajr, a reminder of prayer, of love, hope and other loving things... a necessary. I'm not alone in my needs. Just a girl. A Muslim girl. In love with love and romance too. Isn't this what every woman needs to varying degrees....love and romance?
Sisters get the love you need and desire. It's out there. It does exist. It really does. Romantic and loving Muslim men are out there. Don't deny yourself of something that you need to be happy in this life. Don't settle and then spend the rest of your life complaining and fighting with a man who can never be what you need. Don't try to change a grown man either. Let's work on ourselves first. Be honest and loving to yourself and inshallah those qualities will manifest in the those around you as well.
5 comments:
be honest with ourselves.......sometimes thats just a really scary thing to do.
Alhamdudillah sister! You hit it on the money-that is how I feel about my hubby!
JazakAllah sister for the post, have jus come across it now. Am looking to get married myself and have some what cold feet about it.Have met too many brothers and not found the one. But ur post has reignited my hope that there is someone out there for me.It will be hard to search for him being a revert but may Allah make it soon.ameen.
I just want to give a word of caution...yes 'love' does come later, true later. But don't marry a stranger who you have no feelings for, whose personality and aura does nothing for you. In other words, yur completely unmoved. Islam totally recognizes that you should be attracted to this man yur marrying, so lets not kid ourselves and marry strangers.
One of the reasons in general that marriages in the Muslim world are stronger is because the families are very involved, and are okay with eachother's families and their cultures in terms of their way of life in their homes in similar so then these people get married.
Yep, love is great!
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